Provincial banter battle

The Marlborough-Nelson regional rivalry sees its next battle ground over Anzac weekend with a war of funny words.

Four comedians from each side of the Whangamoas will gather at the Queen Charlotte Tavern in Linkwater on April 26, with the audience deciding which region’s crop of comedians are the funniest for 2025. “The concept came to us a few years ago when we realised that we love to hate Nelson and we must beat them basically as much as possible, and Nelson comedians love to hate us just as much,” says Marlborough team captain Chris Lippy.

“It’s definitely about regional superiority - no matter how much we beat them in being the sunniest region, we keep getting forced together with the Nelson Marlborough DHB or the Tasman NPC team, so there’s less things now to beat them at.

“The Comedy Battle hasn’t been done in a couple of years - it was the Battle for Havelock because we decided Havelock was middle ground, but the Queen Charlotte team are really excited to host a fantastic night of cheeky comedy.”

Marlborough’s team consists of Chris, former Comedy Battle winner Maurice Davies, Max George and Scott McCallum, while Nelson’s representatives are Dave Vandy, Nelson Fringe Festival star Glenn Cousins, Sara O’Connell and one-liner king Tom Baker, while John Nelson provides music throughout the afternoon before the comedy.

And while regional pride is up for grabs, Chris says setting up opportunities for comedians is also key.

“The Comedy Battle is great exposure for local comedians, local fans or prospective comedians, and we’re also looking further afield and working with the Christchurch and Dunedin comedy scenes for more South Island opportunities.”

The Top in the South Comedy Battle is on Saturday April 26 at the Queen Charlotte Tavern. Tickets on the door are $10 with the Battle starting at 7pm and John Nelson providing music through the afternoon.